Monday, May 20, 2013
I've decided to do less divulging and more living and enjoying this new experience, new relationship. I've already had many judgments issued by well meaning friends. I've never been in this place before so as a cautious person I proceed slowly and with my eyes pretty open. Ok, so there are times when love is completely and totally blind. I am fully aware of that fact, and for this reason I counsel with women older than myself. I do NOT ask for advice from those who have ALL the answers. There are many who seem to have ALL the answers for you, but their own lives are total messes. No thanks.
I'm onto bigger and better things. I have refilled my painting supplies and am making time for music and composing. I'm studying art books to refresh my memory of perspective and composition. These are things I do when separated from my new love. My spiritual side is being stretched. New relationships force one to produce the fruits of the spirit. One needs all of these fruits for the new life that is growing from the new connection. Adjustments will have to be made, but compromise of ones moral and spiritual self is a complete "no no" in my estimation. I can be patient without putting up with sinful practices. I can kind without becoming a doormat. I can promote my new love, again without becoming less than I am.
This new phase in my life is exhilarating, and yet there are challenges. I've laid the relationship down in the Father's hand only to have Him hand it back to me strengthened and renewed. Where I have been weak, He has under girded and helped me. Where I have been blind He has supplied elder women with compassion and wisdom to clean my love colored glasses.
I wouldn't miss this new budding romance for all the tea in China or barbecue in Texas! I am learning to shut off the critics and receive instruction from those who have already walked my path. I may have a writer's block, but it's one of my own choosing. I never put on paper what I don't want the whole world to know anyway.
Rejoice with me in my web silence knowing I'm in a good place. I was in a very sad and dark place at the death of my husband of 34 years. God has provided love that fills in places in my life that have never been filled before. I look forward to many more years of writing about where this new path leads. I hope you'll join me on the journey.