A Quiet Spirit

I do a lot of meditating these days. I've been going through some really hard times emotionally speaking, but in the midst of it all I have full confidence I shall come out on top of it all. I have a thousand questions for God these days. One by one He has been so faithful to answer them. I just have to get quiet and really meditate on His word.

It's interesting to look back and see the challenges I've faced over my lifetime and how my Father has seen me through them. He doesn't use things I can anticipate. He demands faith (trust) and doesn't manifest answers without it. "Without faith it is impossible to please Him for those that come to Him must believe He is and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him." There is so much in those few words. These words were recorded by one of the disciples speaking to the Hebrew first century believers. Faith or complete trust is a hard won fruit of the Holy Spirit.

In the midst of the trials I continue to put the word in my heart. I deal with doubt just like any human, but when it comes at me like a blinding rain I continue to sow fresh manna in my soul. Gotta renew my mind and keep the light focused on the dark places in my soul.

I've especially enjoyed my daily reading of the book of Job. I used to be totally freaked out by Job. Who likes to read about suffering when one isn't suffering. Funny though; I've looked at it much differently now that I too have had my share of persecution and suffering. I'm not one to talk about certain areas, but because I feel like I'm on the downward side of this mountain I want to share that there is a light at the end of the tunnel!

Job's "friends" worked for quite some time trying to get Job to repent from some perceived sin. They didn't have the benefit of the book of Job to keep them from opening their blab mouths. "Many are the afflictions of the RIGHTEOUS." One doesn't have to sin to be oppressed or afflicted. One doesn't have to fail to be persecuted.

So I record these thoughts trusting that on the other side of this trial I will see God's answers and rejoice even more than I do by faith. "Count it all joy when you fall into various trials". We don't naturally get joyful at trials and we certainly don't regularly see silver linings in the grayest clouds. I'm looking for the pony in the pile ahead of me.

It is well with my soul.